Today I found training really hard and I think I need to give myself a good talking to. I only trained twice last week, I found myself making excuses and while they seemed good enough at the time, now when I look back it is clear to me that really they were pretty lame. It wasn’t the best of weeks for me and I think I let it get to me too much. I let it knock my confidence.
I know I want to do this, I think about it pretty much all the time and when it goes well the feeling is amazing. So, I know that this week I need to dig deeper and try harder. I need to draw a line under last week and move on.
I think the way to move forward is to look back over the last few weeks and see what I have acheived…When I first started this I had done no real exercise for years. I have never been a great exerciser. As a youngster I used to play sport at school and I enjoyed it. I ran cross-country for the school and played netball and hockey, I was never going to set the world on fire but I was quite active. By the time I reached my teens my love of sport was replaced with a love of Rock music and my new-found interest in boys and booze. I hated PE and even wrote letters to excuse myself from games and signed my Dads name (sorry Dad!). Exercise became a very rare activity for me and in the last 3 years I have hardly left my desk. I hated walking even short distances. At 37 I have found the bad habits of the last decade very hard to break. I developed back problems which I think were made worse by sitting on my ass all the time.
But at the start of this year I decided that I wanted to raise money for a charity that is very close to my heart. So I decided to register for a 5K fun run. Now I could walk it if I wanted but saw this as an opportunity to better myself in the process. I started training to run as much of the 5K as I can. When I look back over the last few weeks I can see that I have already achieved something…for me to even get up of my office chair and walk out the front door is an achievement in itself but I can run now. Not far or for very long but I can run. A couple of weeks ago I walked, with Steve for 7.7km, I didn’t get out of breath and I actually enjoyed it. A couple of months ago the thought of walking even 1km would have filled me with horror and I would have refused to do it! 7.7 km is a miracle for me 🙂
So this is me having a word with myself 🙂 I do feel proud of myself for what I have done so far and I am drawing a line under last week and moving on.